In this spotlight, we feature Carli Herzog, a Haven-trained bereavement doula in Iowa.
Carli, why did you decide to become a bereavement doula?
After I lost my son, John, at 20 weeks gestation in 2021, I attended a wonderful grief center in Ohio called Cornerstone of Hope. I participated in a support group for perinatal loss that was essential to my healing journey. A year later, Cornerstone asked me to speak to the current perinatal loss cohort to answer their questions about life after loss (including pregnancy after loss) and to offer them hope. I remember leaving that day thinking, I want to do this all the time. I found the experience to be incredibly soul filling. I also felt strongly that becoming a bereavement doula was “on-the-ground” medical humanities that brought together my professional background as a professor and my personal loss in a way to help others.
Why did you decide to take a Haven Bereavement Doula training?
Subsequent visits with the perinatal loss groups at Cornerstone confirmed that I wanted to become a bereavement doula. However, I didn’t know that such a role even existed until I came across Abigail Jorgensen’s book, A Catholic Guide to Miscarriage, Stillbirth, and Infant Loss. After hearing Abby (Haven’s founder) speak about her beautiful work as a bereavement doula and scholar – creating social awareness for perinatal loss and space for healing – I connected with her as both a loss mama and fellow academic.
What does serving as a bereavement doula look like for you right now?
I’m an instructor for the Haven Certified Bereavement Doula training, and I lead the Behold Your Child Ministry for loss families in my parish. I also own my own bereavement doula business, Everstead Path, that walks with families through miscarriage, stillbirth, and infant loss. I serve families virtually and locally in Mason City, Iowa through one-on-one consultations and support groups.
What is one thing that you like to do to take care of yourself?
My favorite thing to do is read! I read first thing in the morning with a hot cup of coffee. I also sew, grow microgreens, and make my own wine.
Do you have any advice for anyone who is considering becoming a bereavement doula?
For anyone who is hesitant because they are not a live birth doula, I’d encourage them to take the bereavement doula training anyway. Haven will give you all the tools and knowledge you need to serve loss mamas in the hospital and in the larger community.
We are so grateful for the many ways Carli supports Haven doulas and her community!
For more information about becoming a bereavement doula, check out our guide here.